Changing Perspectives and Rogue Projects
I bumped into an old friend at Walmart the other day. I hadn't seen her in a long time. In fact, the last time I saw her, I think I bumped into her at Walmart. We even joked about it and we're hoping to do better! We talked for about ten minutes, made sure we had each other's numbers (turns out we didn't) and made plans to hang out soon.
Now, I know my life has been a bit chaotic lately even for me. I do feel stressed sometimes and this week I did have a three day migraine headache. It wasn't pretty. But, for the most part, I don't feel like a basket case. I have "cry in my car" days but they're not every day. I'm a hot mess sometimes but honestly, only sometimes.
Yet, during the course of this (relatively brief) conversation, my friend was prompted to reach out and hug me three separate times. When I said there were days when I felt like smashing my head against the wall, she grew concerned and made sure I didn't actually want to hurt myself. I'm not complaining. Hugs are always nice and we should check in with our friends about the state of their mental health. All good. And no, I can't even picture actually wanting to hurt myself just so you know.
After I walked away, I kind of rehashed everything in my head. I'd given her just a few of the high (low?) points of the past couple years. Memory issues and legal blindness for my husband. Unemployment. Trouble with the IRS. Problems with my health insurance. A crazy house guest. My entire family moving in with my mother. I thought, "Holy crap! When you put it all together, this all sounds like next level insanity. No wonder she seemed worried about me!"
I've been toying of the idea of a "rogue project" for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) in November. A rogue project is a writing project which is not a novel. But hey, it's still writing, so it's all good. Anyway, I've been thinking of writing a self help book. I feel certain that the obstacles we place in front of ourselves are WAY more difficult to navigate than anything life actually throws at us. I want to write a book about getting out of your own way.
"I'm not sure I've been through enough yet. Maybe I don't have enough experience to have enough wisdom to write this kind of book." I said to a couple of friends and my mom. One friend said she "had to respectfully disagree". Another friend just asked, "really?" My mom gave me that look. You know the one. The one which says, "You may be an adult but I am still your mother. Don't make me come over there and smack you because I will if I have to!"
And then I saw this quote by Sophia Bush which said, "You're allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously." I think it's true.
When I saw my friend at Walmart, I made some jokes and she remarked that I still had my sense of humor. That I do. And as long as I do, I'm okay. And as long as I'm okay, maybe I can write the book that helps someone else be okay too.
Now, I know my life has been a bit chaotic lately even for me. I do feel stressed sometimes and this week I did have a three day migraine headache. It wasn't pretty. But, for the most part, I don't feel like a basket case. I have "cry in my car" days but they're not every day. I'm a hot mess sometimes but honestly, only sometimes.
Yet, during the course of this (relatively brief) conversation, my friend was prompted to reach out and hug me three separate times. When I said there were days when I felt like smashing my head against the wall, she grew concerned and made sure I didn't actually want to hurt myself. I'm not complaining. Hugs are always nice and we should check in with our friends about the state of their mental health. All good. And no, I can't even picture actually wanting to hurt myself just so you know.
After I walked away, I kind of rehashed everything in my head. I'd given her just a few of the high (low?) points of the past couple years. Memory issues and legal blindness for my husband. Unemployment. Trouble with the IRS. Problems with my health insurance. A crazy house guest. My entire family moving in with my mother. I thought, "Holy crap! When you put it all together, this all sounds like next level insanity. No wonder she seemed worried about me!"
I've been toying of the idea of a "rogue project" for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) in November. A rogue project is a writing project which is not a novel. But hey, it's still writing, so it's all good. Anyway, I've been thinking of writing a self help book. I feel certain that the obstacles we place in front of ourselves are WAY more difficult to navigate than anything life actually throws at us. I want to write a book about getting out of your own way.
"I'm not sure I've been through enough yet. Maybe I don't have enough experience to have enough wisdom to write this kind of book." I said to a couple of friends and my mom. One friend said she "had to respectfully disagree". Another friend just asked, "really?" My mom gave me that look. You know the one. The one which says, "You may be an adult but I am still your mother. Don't make me come over there and smack you because I will if I have to!"
And then I saw this quote by Sophia Bush which said, "You're allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously." I think it's true.
When I saw my friend at Walmart, I made some jokes and she remarked that I still had my sense of humor. That I do. And as long as I do, I'm okay. And as long as I'm okay, maybe I can write the book that helps someone else be okay too.
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