Change Sucks But You Have To Suck It Up
Why do people stay in unhappy marriages and miserable jobs? Why do we hang onto habits and ideas which no longer serve us and maybe never did? Why do we resist change so much?
Because change is hard. Sometimes it just seems easier to stick with the stuff we know even if that stuff makes us unhappy. Growth is almost always uncomfortable and sometimes painful even when it's beneficial to us. It can make you want to say, "Really, life? I'm kinda' tired of this growth business. Could you cut it out, please? Enough already!!!"
Even flexible people don't always do well with these types of changes, especially if they make you question your beliefs, your choices or your relationships. So how do we cope?
Change is inevitable. We think we spend long periods of time in calm and sameness yet if you add it all up, we probably spend more time in a state of flux than we think. Remember that nothing is forever. Just as a perceived period of stability comes to an end and you find yourself uprooted or upended, so too will the period of change end. Accepting that it's going to happen can help you go with the flow a little more.
Guess what? Not only does change happen but there's also very little we can do about it. Sometimes stuff just happens. The only thing you can really, truly control is your attitude. Someone I know recently lamented that he felt like he'd lost control of his life. Dude, did you ever have control of your life? Probably not. Illusions of control are almost always that: illusions.
Repetition of old patterns is comforting. Sometimes we mistake familiarity for effectiveness. As the old saying goes, insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Change can be overwhelming. Try to have an open mind. Asking why just makes you feel like a victim and you're not. I promise you, the universe is not out to get you personally even though it may feel that way.
Instead of asking why, try asking better questions like "Who can I ask for support?" or "How can I learn from this experience?" Resisting change isn't going to stop it from happening, it's just going make it harder.
Because change is hard. Sometimes it just seems easier to stick with the stuff we know even if that stuff makes us unhappy. Growth is almost always uncomfortable and sometimes painful even when it's beneficial to us. It can make you want to say, "Really, life? I'm kinda' tired of this growth business. Could you cut it out, please? Enough already!!!"
Even flexible people don't always do well with these types of changes, especially if they make you question your beliefs, your choices or your relationships. So how do we cope?
Change is inevitable. We think we spend long periods of time in calm and sameness yet if you add it all up, we probably spend more time in a state of flux than we think. Remember that nothing is forever. Just as a perceived period of stability comes to an end and you find yourself uprooted or upended, so too will the period of change end. Accepting that it's going to happen can help you go with the flow a little more.
Guess what? Not only does change happen but there's also very little we can do about it. Sometimes stuff just happens. The only thing you can really, truly control is your attitude. Someone I know recently lamented that he felt like he'd lost control of his life. Dude, did you ever have control of your life? Probably not. Illusions of control are almost always that: illusions.
Repetition of old patterns is comforting. Sometimes we mistake familiarity for effectiveness. As the old saying goes, insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Change can be overwhelming. Try to have an open mind. Asking why just makes you feel like a victim and you're not. I promise you, the universe is not out to get you personally even though it may feel that way.
Instead of asking why, try asking better questions like "Who can I ask for support?" or "How can I learn from this experience?" Resisting change isn't going to stop it from happening, it's just going make it harder.
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